Bubba and Billy Joe are walking down the street in Atlanta, and they see a sign on a store which reads, "Suits $5.00 each!, shirts $2.00 each, pants $2.50 each.
Bubba says to his pal, "Billy Joe , Look here! We could buy a whole gob of these, take 'em back to Sand Mountain, sell 'em to our friends, and make a fortune. Just let me do the talkin' 'cause if they hear your accent, they might think we're ignorant, and not wanna sell that stuff to us.
Now, I'll talk in a slow Georgia drawl so's they don't know we is from Alabama ..."
They go in and Bubba says with his best fake Georgia drawl,
"I'll take 50 of them suits at $5.00 each, 100 of them there shirts
at $2.00 each, 50 pairs of them there pants at $2.50 each. I'll
back up my pickup and...."
The owner of the shop interrupts, "Ya'll from North Alabama,
ain' t ya?"
"Well...yeah," says a surprised Bubba...."How come you knowed
that?
"Because this is a dry-cleaners."
Bubba and Billy Joe are walking down the street in Atlanta, and they see a sign on a store which reads, "Suits $5.00 each!, shirts $2.00 each, pants $2.50 each.
Bubba says to his pal, "Billy Joe , Look here! We could buy a whole gob of these, take 'em back to Sand Mountain, sell 'em to our friends, and make a fortune. Just let me do the talkin' 'cause if they hear your accent, they might think we're ignorant, and not wanna sell that stuff to us.
Now, I'll talk in a slow Georgia drawl so's they don't know we is from Alabama ..."
They go in and Bubba says with his best fake Georgia drawl,
"I'll take 50 of them suits at $5.00 each, 100 of them there shirts
at $2.00 each, 50 pairs of them there pants at $2.50 each. I'll
back up my pickup and...."
The owner of the shop interrupts, "Ya'll from North Alabama,
ain' t ya?"
"Well...yeah," says a surprised Bubba...."How come you knowed
Yes, my cultured multi-lingual gentleman. If said hardware store also has a refrigerator with milk, cheese, beer and microwaveable burritos, you are most assuredly Redneck.
Yes, my cultured multi-lingual gentleman. If said hardware store also has a refrigerator with milk, cheese, beer and microwaveable burritos, you are most assuredly Redneck.
How 'bout if your local hardware store sends out fliers to let you know they've got a special on cow feed? Does that increase the possibility you might be a red neck?
Donna Gentilezza,
How 'bout if your local hardware store sends out fliers to let you know they've got a special on cow feed? Does that increase the possibility you might be a red neck?
REDNECK I AM YES I AM COUNTRY LOVE THE COUNTRY YES I GOT RED BANNDANA TO PROVE IT I PROUD TO BE REDNECK I GOT THREE CHICKS THEY GROWING UP INTO CHICKENS NATURE WAY LOL YES CHICKENS ROCK ME TOO I REDNECK I CHASE MY CHICKS THEY LOVE FREEDOM TOO!
REDNECK I AM YES I AM COUNTRY LOVE THE COUNTRY YES I GOT RED BANNDANA TO PROVE IT I PROUD TO BE REDNECK I GOT THREE CHICKS THEY GROWING UP INTO CHICKENS NATURE WAY LOL YES CHICKENS ROCK ME TOO I REDNECK I CHASE MY CHICKS THEY LOVE FREEDOM TOO!
Hey I kid you not! I met this guy who had no picture on the internet. When he showed up at my door I took him to the "mud Bogs" at the Paw Paw Fair. That way we could mix in with the crowd and no one could see me or think nothing. I met this man on this site (one of those real creatures) and took him to the mountains where there was no cell service. Honest!!! I live in WV folks. Does that qualify me? I think I might be a Redneck.
Lynn Cat...you must certainly qualify, if any of us do, as a card carrying REDNECK...and I mean that in the most loving way, so ya know :)
Quoting Lynncat
Hey I kid you not! I met this guy who had no picture on the internet. When he showed up at my door I took him to the "mud Bogs" at the Paw Paw Fair. That way we could mix in with the crowd and no one could see me or think nothing. I met this man on this site (one of those real creatures) and took him to the mountains where there was no cell service. Honest!!! I live in WV folks. Does that qualify me? I think I might be a Redneck.
Lynn Cat...you must certainly qualify, if any of us do, as a card carrying REDNECK...and I mean that in the most loving way, so ya know :)
Hey I kid you not! I met this guy who had no picture on the internet. When he showed up at my door I took him to the "mud Bogs" at the Paw Paw Fair. That way we could mix in with the crowd and no one could see me or think nothing. I met this man on this site (one of those real creatures) and took him to the mountains where there was no cell service. Honest!!! I live in WV folks. Does that qualify me? I think I might be a Redneck.
Hey I kid you not! I met this guy who had no picture on the internet. When he showed up at my door I took him to the "mud Bogs" at the Paw Paw Fair. That way we could mix in with the crowd and no one could see me or think nothing. I met this man on this site (one of those real creatures) and took him to the mountains where there was no cell service. Honest!!! I live in WV folks. Does that qualify me? I think I might be a Redneck.
Oh, my neglect is soooo redneck. I've got blogs parked in front of my trailor I don't even drive!
@ Empess and Conyers, I have to agree, as much as they're fun to stereotype (and c'mon, a cliche is only repeated because it's true), there is a quality about the simple unpretentiousness that I totally love.
@ JMSuccess...Howdy pardner.
And because I love y'all, I have a present...Google "The Dialectizer" to translate your favorite news pages into redneck. Throw in your URL and viola - a translation of a Wall Street Journal article:
Researchers identified a rare junetic mutashun thet may open a noo avenue fo' treatin' Tourette syndrome in a study published Wednesday thet examined a fambly in which th' Pappy an' all eight chillun suffer fum th' neurological diso'der.
Th' fambly's mutashun affecked a june required t'prodooce histamine. Pharmaceutical companies is already developin' drugs fo' other corndishuns thet targit th' brain's histamine system, dawgone it. Th' study's researchers is plannin' a clinical trial of adults wif Tourette t'see eff'n them drugs'd he'p corntrol th' moto' an' vocal tics thet chareeckerize th' condishun.
Tourette syndrome is believed t'affeck 1% of th' populashun. Th' condishun is not life-thrett upin' but kin be debilitatin'. Th' tics, which kin involve eye blinkin', gruntin' an' shoutin', offen appear initially in mid-chilehood, cuss it all t' tarnation. Scientists doesn't knows th' diso'der's cuz but believe it has a strong junetic component.
Oh, my neglect is soooo redneck. I've got blogs parked in front of my trailor I don't even drive!
@ Empess and Conyers, I have to agree, as much as they're fun to stereotype (and c'mon, a cliche is only repeated because it's true), there is a quality about the simple unpretentiousness that I totally love.
@ JMSuccess...Howdy pardner.
And because I love y'all, I have a present...Google "The Dialectizer" to translate your favorite news pages into redneck. Throw in your URL and viola - a translation of a Wall Street Journal article:
Researchers identified a rare junetic mutashun thet may open a noo avenue fo' treatin' Tourette syndrome in a study published Wednesday thet examined a fambly in which th' Pappy an' all eight chillun suffer fum th' neurological diso'der.
Th' fambly's mutashun affecked a june required t'prodooce histamine. Pharmaceutical companies is already developin' drugs fo' other corndishuns thet targit th' brain's histamine system, dawgone it. Th' study's researchers is plannin' a clinical trial of adults wif Tourette t'see eff'n them drugs'd he'p corntrol th' moto' an' vocal tics thet chareeckerize th' condishun.
Tourette syndrome is believed t'affeck 1% of th' populashun. Th' condishun is not life-thrett upin' but kin be debilitatin'. Th' tics, which kin involve eye blinkin', gruntin' an' shoutin', offen appear initially in mid-chilehood, cuss it all t' tarnation. Scientists doesn't knows th' diso'der's cuz but believe it has a strong junetic component.
Tar-NAtion ! I completely MISSED this. yeah you can decide after i pick the colors. and we WILL meet up soon, my Magic 8 Ball said so !
Quoting GentlyWoman
Shaz, due to the recent post I read that you would not be meeting me in the city, I feel that our only option will be that I come paint your house for you. Can I decide afterward if I want to apply as your wife? It may really come down to your color choices, whether or not we will be compatible.
I think this would qualify me as a NorCal Redneck, don't you?
Quoting GentlyWoman
Shaz, due to the recent post I read that you would not be meeting me in the city, I feel that our only option will be that I come paint your house for you. Can I decide afterward if I want to apply as your wife? It may really come down to your color choices, whether or not we will be compatible.
I think this would qualify me as a NorCal Redneck, don't you?
Tar-NAtion ! I completely MISSED this. yeah you can decide after i pick the colors. and we WILL meet up soon, my Magic 8 Ball said so !
I was wondering what ever happened to Esther ! She got herself a new gig as an airbag ! The PoleCat can be proud ! ( our old guard Limp Wrist before there was a limp)
Quoting The_Rose
Redneck airbags..
Quoting The_Rose
Redneck airbags..
I was wondering what ever happened to Esther ! She got herself a new gig as an airbag ! The PoleCat can be proud ! ( our old guard Limp Wrist before there was a limp)
Hey, sometimes concrete thinking is good, too. Some principles ought to be inviolate.
--Your comment brought to mind a few years back ( 12-20 ?) 60 Minutes did an expose on the Annawakee children's home (in GA) and the scumbag director who turned out to be a serial, multiple child molestor. The local sherif arrested him without any evidence, and lo and behold, the evidence came flooding out. The 60 minutes team was trying to make the (older) Southern Sheriff out to be a hick, treading on the scumbag's civil liberties. His reply, in a deep, slooooowwwww, southern drawl was, "Usually, when it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and sounds like a duck, waaaaaaal, we jes' figger it's a duck." --- Out of the mouths of babes..... or in this case a seasoned lawman. If you listened to what he said, rather than how he said it, he looked like a Nobel laureate compared to his interviewers.
Same sheriff, a couple years later, went to Florida to pick up a serial murderer. The bad guy had to be shot when he attempted to escape on the ride back to W. GA for his fourth or fifth capital trial.
Now, there is a side of redneck you have to love. ...and fiscally efficient, too !!!!!!
Quoting Empress9
To quote Trace and Blake, "We all have a Hillbilly bone down deep inside..." The music says it all. Hank Williams,Johnny Cash, Miranda Lambert,etc. It's easy to joke about it, but I mooved to redneck land from the West Coast, and the people are really kind, giving, although a bit concrete in their thinking.
Quoting Empress9
To quote Trace and Blake, "We all have a Hillbilly bone down deep inside..." The music says it all. Hank Williams,Johnny Cash, Miranda Lambert,etc. It's easy to joke about it, but I mooved to redneck land from the West Coast, and the people are really kind, giving, although a bit concrete in their thinking.
Hey, sometimes concrete thinking is good, too. Some principles ought to be inviolate.
--Your comment brought to mind a few years back ( 12-20 ?) 60 Minutes did an expose on the Annawakee children's home (in GA) and the scumbag director who turned out to be a serial, multiple child molestor. The local sherif arrested him without any evidence, and lo and behold, the evidence came flooding out. The 60 minutes team was trying to make the (older) Southern Sheriff out to be a hick, treading on the scumbag's civil liberties. His reply, in a deep, slooooowwwww, southern drawl was, "Usually, when it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and sounds like a duck, waaaaaaal, we jes' figger it's a duck." --- Out of the mouths of babes..... or in this case a seasoned lawman. If you listened to what he said, rather than how he said it, he looked like a Nobel laureate compared to his interviewers.
Same sheriff, a couple years later, went to Florida to pick up a serial murderer. The bad guy had to be shot when he attempted to escape on the ride back to W. GA for his fourth or fifth capital trial.
Now, there is a side of redneck you have to love. ...and fiscally efficient, too !!!!!!
To quote Trace and Blake, "We all have a Hillbilly bone down deep inside..." The music says it all. Hank Williams,Johnny Cash, Miranda Lambert,etc. It's easy to joke about it, but I mooved to redneck land from the West Coast, and the people are really kind, giving, although a bit concrete in their thinking.
To quote Trace and Blake, "We all have a Hillbilly bone down deep inside..." The music says it all. Hank Williams,Johnny Cash, Miranda Lambert,etc. It's easy to joke about it, but I mooved to redneck land from the West Coast, and the people are really kind, giving, although a bit concrete in their thinking.
